Wake up and Smell the Coffee

Sade Boyea
Nov 4, 2019
3 min read

Updated: Jan 2

To New Beginnings

Let’s take the start from intimidating words of Beverly Engel

“Turn down the volume of your negative inner voice and create a nourishing inner voice to take its place. When you make a mistake, forgive yourself, learn from it, and move on instead of obsessing about it. Equally important, don’t allow anyone else to dwell on your mistakes or shortcomings or to expect perfection from you.”

Define your mistakes?

You loved the wrong person and invested all your emotions where they were nothing of worth.

You were supposed to keep a secret but spilled it at a very vulnerable moment.

Maybe you were supposed to study for an exam, and you procrastinated there. It might be like you were in a denial phase where reality was much needed.

There can be many things in our life for which we feel guilty, right? The problematic and tricky part is to forgive ourselves and move on.

A very famous motivational speaker Les Brown says;

“Forgive yourself for your faults and mistakes and move on.”

When you realize your mistakes and figure out the “Why” factor behind it, this, no doubt, maybe a very depressing phase in your life. Your emotions are going to be going through emotions, and you instantly feel hopeless. But honestly, what good are you doing to yourself when you continuously press replay on your life to live through the same scenarios of punishing yourself for the mistakes made in the past? ZERO!

Trust me! It won’t help.

Alex Elle says, “Offer yourself the same forgiveness that you’ve shared with others. You are deserving.”

Are you ready to heal?

Because this is very important. When asked this question, some people might say “of course I am,” and others might look at you with a facial expression that says,” you think I wanna be hurting all the time” But do you?

Are you ready to heal?

Like really?

Depending on how deep the scars are, it is not an overnight process. Healing, sometimes comes with “Letting Go,” letting go of what you might ask? “People” Oh yeah, I just hit you right in the gut didn’t I.

I know this kind of healing, oh too well, but that’s another blog post “stay tuned” Its gonna take time, self-love, self-care and patience, patience, patience, and patience. You must decide either you want to punish yourself by adding a pinch of salt to your wounds every day, or you want to stop this constant ache.

“Accepting the past by forgiving myself and leaving it there, wherefrom it belongs.”

Guilt VS Shame:

“Guilt serves a purpose. Shame doesn’t,”

Shame is harder than guilt. Guilt is something that weighs on your conscious like a ton of bricks, so we bear it for only so long before we try to dissect the issue to figure out what went wrong and ways to mend it.

Shame, on the other hand, is a feeling that comes from deep within. A feeling that hits your core inside and makes you feel like you have let the whole world down, and you don’t deserve forgiveness. You emotionally hide from the outside world and become a victim to yourself. We must always avoid this. If something is not in your control, please, you need to let it go. Let it go and let God.

Lower your gaze a little and look at those who dream of living half the life that you currently live.

Never Miss The Chances!

Every day is a new opportunity for you to be a better person. So, take it as a chance to correct the things instead of reliving bad memories.